Who Doesn’t Love Topless Women?

I had meant to follow-up my previous post “I Just Don’t Get the Jesus Myth”, but I’ve been a bit distracted the past few days. I’ll have to get back to that one soon. That said, I must’ve been really distracted, since I’m not sure how I missed this one:

Topless Protester Disrupt Muslim Conference on Women

I’m sure this story has already been kicked around the blogosphere, but I feel compelled to add my two cents on the matter. For those too lazy to read the 600 word article I’ll give a brief run down of the facts:

  1. Two Muslim men were on stage debating the important topic, “Should wives be beaten or not?” (Answer = Obvious)
  2. The debate was interrupted by two Muslim extremist women who tore off their bee keeper outfits, grabbed the microphones, and paraded around the stage topless. (Topless! They didn’t even have the decency to strap bombs to their chests to cover themselves.)
  3. The two terrorists were properly subdued by approximately 15 men. Before they were dragged out into the street and stoned given proper justice, someone pointed out the conference was taking place in France, and the women were turned over to the police.
  4. Over 6,000 clueless people sign a meaningless online petition denouncing the event.
  5. The conference organizers defend their right to assemble and claim they are “the victim of an anti-Muslim media frenzy.”

All silliness and sarcasm aside, I’m not going to discuss this story in the obvious context of the women. As I said, I’m late to the party on that score and, no doubt, people more eloquent than me have begged the question, “How is the subject of whether or not women should be beaten an actual topic of discussion?” If the preamble isn’t something along the lines of, “So this women walks up to me and puts a gun in my face,…”, the answer is almost certainly going to be “It is not a topic for discussion. Ever! Never, ever, ever, never, ever, never, never!!!”

I’m actually going to look at this article in the context of point #5. The conference and the organizers are “victims”. The gall of the Abrahamic faiths and their persecution complexes never ceases to amaze me. Here we have the quintessential example of Muslim men sitting around discussing the best ways to oppress women and when they get called out on their immorality, they claim to be persecuted.

Who in the world could possibly believe this line of reasoning?

Clearly, Muslims. Especially Muslims in France, where they likely, are being persecuted as a minority. The fact that they’re persecuted for exactly this kind of crap seems to escape them. But they have the right to their own religious beliefs, and if you sincerely believe women should be subjugated then it’s okay, because Allah.

Of course, these faiths don’t even have to be the minority to be persecuted. Christians in the U. S. represent 73% of the populace and they’re being persecuted like a MuthaF#$%&@. Ever since Kim Davis was arrested for contempt of court being a Christian, all hell has broken out [add link when hell breaks loose].

I’ve spoken to two Christians about their current persecution, and rather surprisingly they’ve both tried to defend it. Both, I know well enough I can vouch for them not being homophobic, and are both pro-gay marriage, but they insist that some sort of “slippery slope” is happening to their rights to be Christians because their immoral Bible is being ignored by our secular government.

When I asked them to tell me specifically what rights they are being denied as Christians, all I get is first amendment rhetoric. Even though no one, not even The Gays, is preventing them from being Christian. If they were TRUE Christians and believed in their Bible, they’d take to the streets and stone every gay person they saw.

The fact that ALL of our rights end at our own personal boundaries (a term I’ll leave intentionally vague to encompass more than just our physical bodies when the right in question regards personal property, etc.). Somehow, they expect religious beliefs to be allowed to transcend their space.

I’m sorry, I meant to say, “They expect THEIR religious beliefs to transcend their space.”

We certainly wouldn’t want Muslims to start dictating how people dress in this country.

Oops, those were Christians.

And to make sure the Jews don’t get a complete pass in this post, I’m counting the days before all women have to turn in their driver’s licenses because the Hasid’s said so.

Crap! Now I’m persecuting Jews. Yahweh’s special little children. As if they haven’t been persecuted enough by Yahweh.

I Just Don’t Get the Jesus Myth

I have several friends with whom I discuss Christianity. When I ask them point blank to explain it, generally they cannot. When I tell them what it is they’re supposed to believe, they give me this look as though I’m the one being utterly naive.

A few weeks ago, I start a conversation with a married couple I am friends with using a line I stole from Noah Lusians, host of the Scathing Atheist podcast, “So you believe the earth was populated after a person made out of a rib was tricked into eating a fruit by a talking serpent?”

In hindsight, my biggest fear in starting the conversation probably should have been the response, “Yes, the earth was populated after a person made out of a rib was tricked into eating a fruit by a talking serpent. And?”

Me: “And you’re clearly bat-shit-crazy.”

End Scene.

Instead, they give me, “The Look” for a few seconds. A half baked smile-grimace on their faces. One of them manages to suggest, “Well, it’s actually a metaphor.”

Me: “Okay, explain the metaphor. A metaphor is a comparison of two, possibly disparate things, using a common thread between the two ideas, concepts, objects, whatever’s being compared.”

Eventually, they manage to squeak out something about original sin. Although I still don’t see the actual metaphor, their words are ridiculous and I suspect would cause me physical pain and vomiting, if I try to get them to clarify. So I let the whole metaphor thing go under the assumption that they don’t know their own religion well enough to explain it properly. After all, neither of them are theologians. I continue.

Me: “So this original sin never actually happened, it’s just a metaphor?”

They don’t commit to anything, at first. (NOTE: It’s about here the husband has to go to work, so I am left talking with just the wife.) The wife reasons through a few facts about evolution and comes to the conclusion that our species probably didn’t come about from just two people, the proverbial Adam and Eve. So as previously suggested, this original sin probably didn’t actually happen.

I’m actually delighted to speak with a “reasonable” Christian. But there’s a reason that “real” Christians fight so hard to deny evolution.

Me: “The only reason to believe in Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior is because the Original Sin literally happened. Because of this sin, the Holy Spirit, who is also Yahweh, ethereally rapes some young woman so she could have himself (Yahweh) in the form of Jesus (who is also Yahweh?) as her baby.”

I had to mentally make sure I got all that correct, so I let those words hang in the air for moment before continuing.

Me: “Next, Jesus grows up and is tortured and crucified, allowing his (Yahweh’s) sacrifice to atone for mankind’s original sin, which never actually happened, but in metaphor. So there’s really no reason for Yahweh to sacrifice himself, except for what? Dramatic purposes?”

At this point, my friend, she has nothing. More or less, she changes the subject, and I let it go. No doubt, she thinks I’m playing with her, or mocking her faith or whatever, but I genuinely want to understand. I don’t say things in this way about Christianity to be mocking, I say them in this way, because that’s how they sound to me.

At this point, I’m trying to figure out if Jesus’s death was some kind of metaphor of a metaphor, a meta-metaphor? I don’t know. Quite honestly, I would love to believe in a higher power of some kind, but does it have sound so ridiculous?